My Self-Care Shower Ritual For Relaxation & Healing

Unknowingly, sometimes, I believe we are too mean to ourselves. We harbor feelings of doubt, shame, and guilt and recently my personal war has been not feeling good enough. The question now becomes how do I manage those feelings and soothe my mind? The answer, self-care.

Self-care is one of the hottest wellness trends right now but what does it really mean? For me, it’s really about reminding yourself that everything is going to be ok. Taking time to be gentle and to slow down. A time to unfold. A time to make you your highest priority, without interruption, judgment, and expectation. There is something to be said for scheduled self-care dates but I think one of the easiest ways to practice self-care is to add extra time and be more intentional with activities that are already part of your daily routine. Like taking a shower, for example. You already do this so why not make taking a shower a healing experience as well?

One of my favorite self-care rituals is taking a loving cleansing shower. This might sound a bit odd but follow me on this. For many of us, the first thing we want to do after a long day of building our empire is take a nice hot shower. Personally, I like to use this time not only for a refresher but also a destresser. A time to show myself extra love and extra care. This time is especially important when the world and/or you have beaten yourself up. The external challenges we face daily are one thing but the mental wars we fight are a whole other situation. Adding a little extra time and care to your shower can be a great way to recover and tend your wounds from that mental war.

Here are a few things I do to transform my shower time from a regular scrub down to an indulgent act of love.

1. Set the mood

Lighting a couple of candles and playing your favorite sensual playlist goes a long way. Do all the sexy things you would for a late night date but this show is just for you.

2. Add a little essential oil

As the shower is steaming up, add a few drops of essential oil to the tub. The scented steam from the hot water will instantly transform the bathroom into your own luxury spa. Aromatherapy can be a powerful tool when combating stress. Choose a scent that you love but also gives the effect you need. Personally I love eucalyptus and lavender.

3. Offer yourself the best

This is not the time for your bright green cheap soap bar or chemical-filled over-scented body wash. Treat yourself to clean natural luxurious products. Self-care is also about being intentional with what you put on and in your body, soap included. For added body buffing, consider adding an exfoliating step once a week.

4. Positive self talk & cleanse

Now that you have the mood set and you are feeling calmer already, it’s time to cleanse away the day. This is the most important part of the entire shower ritual. I’ve addressed this a few times before, but positive self-talk is a game changer. The things we say to ourselves can be really harsh and downright hateful. Instead of replaying the events of the day and reliving every mistake, failure, and heartbreak, use this time to let it all go. As you are washing your body focus on:


Forgiveness is a gift. We often talk about forgiving other people and how it is more for your peace of mind than it is theirs, but how often do we talk about forgiving ourselves? Not only for the visible mistakes but also for the quiet moments of despair.

Lather up your body and mentally speak forgiveness to yourself. Forgive yourself for what you didn’t know. Forgive yourself for not being compassionate when you needed it most. Forgive yourself for not allowing your best self to shine through a difficult situation. Forgive yourself for not speaking up, standing out or walking away when you should have. Forgive yourself for the comparisons, the self-deprecating jokes that actually hurt and the mean girl comments that you would not even tell your worst enemy.


As the warm water washes off the suds, the dead skin, and the day’s grime, release every idea, situation, and relationship that does not serve you. Imagine all that stress and negativity moving from your body down the drain and away from your life. Say it out loud, “I release everything that does not serve me and choose a life filled with purpose, love, and joy.”

5. Moisturize

This might be my favorite step in the entire ritual. Now that you are clean, relaxed and calm, it’s time to sweet talk and rub yourself down, honey. As you moisturize with your favorite oil, lotion, or body butter from your sister friend who whips up miracles in her kitchen, affirm everything that you are and intend to be. Take your time and slowly soothe each body part and appreciate the beauty that you are spiritually, mentally, intellectually and most definitely physically. Tell your body why you love it and thank it for carrying you on this journey.

After doing this I promise you you will feel so calm and loved. This shower ritual is something I developed over the past few months and I love it. Feel free to take it and make it your own. In the comment section below, let me know what you think and how you customized your shower ritual!

My Self-Care Shower Ritual For Relaxation & Healing